Why am I Always Running Out of "Going-out" Tops?
It’s another Thursday night and I have nothing to wear out. I’m tearing through my closet and I’ve worn all of my “going out” tops already. I took pictures in them. They’re on Facebook. I can’t wear them again. This always happens.
Being at Towson, I was lucky enough to have a huge mall right on campus: The Towson Town Center. It was truly amazing and gi-normous. Not to mention it has the best Nordstrom Rack I’ve ever seen. This became part of my routine in college, stopping by The Rack and seeing what was new. The thing about this particular Nordstrom Rack is that is was directly underneath all of the levels of Nordstrom’s so everything just came directly down. This meant all the good stuff and a huge variety. When I didn’t find something here, there was always Brass Plum just one level up with lots of cheap top options. Then there was always the massive Forever 21 that really never let me down.
I realized after a while that I kept buying the same tops over and over again. I needed to change my style outlook. I have worked in retail my entire life and had tons of clothes (because of my discounts!) but never enough going out tops. I guess I just bought more everyday stuff (t-shirts and sweats) because I felt that I would use them more, which I did. But now it was college and I needed nicer stuff to go out. I started buying more “staple” pieces that I would actually let myself wear more than once. This included a standard black blazer that I could wear over any top, black leggings, skinny jeans, long under-tanks, wedges and silk blouses. I guess this really still applies today because I still wear these things.
By my sophomore year I was working at South Moon Under in Towson—one of the biggest of all the South Moon stores! This of course added more to my wardrobe and nothing to my bank account. I was still a poor college student even though I had a job! You can’t blame me I mean it was like working in a candy store.
Now that I’m out of college I’m back working as a manager at my boutique here in Maryland called B Scene. This has the same type of clothes as South Moon but with a better employee discount! Fashion has always been a big part of my life because I am a strong believer in expressing yourself (which is why I love Dormify)!
I still find myself buying more causal pieces though like jeans and sweaters even though I go out in DC a lot. I guess I just know I will only wear my nicer things once or twice so I won’t allow myself in indulge too heavily. I did learn, however, to buy “staple” wardrobe pieces that you can wear out again and again. Try looking at the places I mentioned. If you’re in the Potomac, MD area then come to B Scene and I’ll help you find everything! What are your favorite places to shop and your wardrobe “staples?”
Yes, it’s true. We’ve all done it (and if you haven’t then god bless you). But really, it happens. It tends to happen the most in college especially if you’re doing some long-distance thing. It’s really the most horrible thing you can do to a person but it does make you think: why? Why did I do it? For me it took a lot of self-analyzation to realize this, something that really helped the healing process and helped me to not hate myself.
The first thing you have to realize is that you’re human. The second thing you have to realize is that he’s human too. Sh*t happens. He’s probably done the same thing and is too proud to admit it and would rather pin all the guilt on you. I don’t care if you’ve been together since freshman year of high school, temptation is out there and it’s hard when you’re apart from one another. College is this new and exciting time in your life and no matter how much you love this person and want to stay with them (and trust me I know the feeling), it’s really just better to be apart while your at school. Don’t do the whole “open relationship” BS that never works and it just hurts you both. I’m telling you I went through all this and I’m giving you my best advice.
Boys and relationships are difficult. College isn’t the time to be tied down anyway. Yes, our mothers have always told us this and strangely, these old women are right. College is for exploring and dating around. It’s for making friends that will someday be your bridesmaids. It’s about being crazy and living life with no regrets. If you’re tied down, your most likely going to cheat. Everyone does. I had to keep telling myself this because when I did it, I had never felt so low in my entire life. Don’t be fooled—I’ve been cheated on too. For an entire year and a half I was cheated on (without knowing) and stayed with this douchebag only to get my heart broken. It’s not worth it!
Being out of college has really changed my perspective. I see my little sister, a junior in college, struggling with the same things I did and it’s amazes me how little it all means when you’re out of school. I know everything seems so important right now and urgent, but it’s not! It’s just like high school; do any of those problems matter any more? No! If they do, you need to move on.
You’re going to make mistakes in your life, huge ones. But you have to cut yourself a break. Stop living in the past and thinking about all the things you would have done differently because you can’t change anything, you just can’t! The most we can do is apologize to the ones we’ve hurt and realize that everything happens for a reason. This is a guiding force in my life and really keeps me going. Try telling yourself that every once in a while when times get hard, everything happens for a reason. And remember to breathe. Time heals everything and in a week, it won’t seem so bad.
So stop beating yourself up—smile! These are the best days of your life! Focus on school because it’s seriously important if you want to get a job—it took me a year after I graduated to find one (and I was on the dean’s list every year)! Times are hard; think about what really matters. Keep your chin up, beautiful.
As an intern for Dormify, I will be sharing some of the blog posts I write for their site:
Why Can't I Get Myself to the Gym?
Seriously. I always say I’m going to go and I have a membership…so why can’t I get myself to go? I always feel like I need to be “in the mood” in order to go. If I’m not, I’m going to get there and have no motivation to do anything. I guess I would prefer taking a class, but it always seems like I can never make the time schedule or I don’t feel like going at that time. Where is all my energy—why am I always tired?
I know one reason: I am on an anti-depressant for anxiety, which certainly has a side effect of tiredness. But I’ve been told I can increase my energy level if I start working out. But as I said, it’s hard for me to get to the gym in the first place. I’ve been trying to find things to do/eat that will increase my energy level because I hate always being tired. It seems like that was all I ever was in college, tired, aside from when I was going out and getting ready to go out. Those were the best times—getting ready with your friends. It’s the excitement of what the night is going to bring! I wish I could feel that everyday but it’s certainly hard when I was waking up early for classes and sitting through boring lectures.
One way I get my energy is through coffee. I’m obsessed with coffee. I’m not a huge fan of all the really sweet syrupy drinks—I’m more of a straight coffee with cream and sugar person. I like to get right to the point—and right to the caffeine. I could really drink coffee all day, and sometimes I do, although I realize too much of anything isn’t good (well except for shoes). So I started looking into other methods of boosting energy, without chugging those disgusting (and probably horrible for you) five-hour energy shots.
There is much truth to the “always eat breakfast” rule. When I skipped out or only had coffee, I found myself starving within an hour. Ever since I started to eat something in the morning, I have been able to last longer till lunch. It really made me more awake too. My favorite is oatmeal. I love a big bowl with brown sugar, almonds/walnuts (nuts have energy) and whatever fruit I have laying around. If I have it, I’ll also add in flax seeds or granola. To top it off, I put Silk Vanilla on top and mix it all together. Not that I’m lactose intolerant, but I just love the taste of Silk Vanilla and I have completely cut out regular milk because of it. Seriously try it in your cereal. It’s weird at first because it’s a thicker consistency than milk but I promise it’s really, really good.
Quick power naps help—although for me these naps usually turn into a couple hours of napping, I like to call them “sleeps.” If you’re able to have a quick nap then by all means, do it! For me, I have to leave gaps of time open and sometimes I’m out for the night, depending on how tired I am. It’s very confusing when I wake up.
Drink more water! This really helped me immensely! It’s crazy how much this works—the only downfall is I have to run to the bathroom a lot but maybe I’ll build up a tolerance? I also read to drink less alcohol…no thanks.
Talking “a walk around the block” is said to increase your energy. Well, you all walk to classes every day so I think this covers that. Stretching, however, is something you can do in your dorm room. It increases the flow of energy throughout your body. This sometimes makes me sleepy though—I have to put on some pump-up music so I don’t get tired!
Another way to increase energy is to reduce stress! HA! I found this hilarious. You are in college and stress is guaranteed! So many papers, projects, exams, speeches, presentations, group meetings, sorority events, boyfriend problems, roommate issues—the list goes on! I need more energy so I can even attempt to deal with all this stuff. “Reduce stress.” Like this is so easy and can be done in the snap of a finger. BS. I can only think to try to add in more relaxation activities in your day (even though I know your already extremely busy). Whether you enjoy manicures, tanning, massages, reading, whatever, try to allow some time for you to un-wind.
Ah, well. That’s it for me. I hope I could lend you some of the advice I wish I had in college. This honestly all seems so obvious but sometimes it takes a little refresher to remind you of the little things. Don’t get too caught up in the drama and remember to take care of yourself. Most of all—have fun! These are truly the best years of your life. My mom always told me this but I always took it for granted—I would do anything to go back and re-live my college years.
When I was in college, the best thing in the world was coming home for the holiday season. Thanksgiving isn’t even a huge holiday in my family, being that I don’t have a lot of family, but I still get that extreme excited feeling every year. My family really doesn’t have any traditions, for example we end up doing something different every year.
Last year, we had Thanksgiving dinner at one of my mom’s friends’ houses. That’s right—my mom’s friend. Meaning no one in the family had met anyone in their family before having Thanksgiving dinner with them (talk about awkward). It was a strange day but fun nonetheless. They happened to be great people with excellent cooking stills, which always makes for a good time. It was a little strange when we all held hands and did a “group prayer” before dinner, since my family is not very religious, but my sisters and I giggled through it. It was really a bonding experience for my sisters and I since we were the only people we knew! The night turned out to be a lot of fun and for the first time ever (on Thanksgiving), I ended up going out with their kids to a bar at the end of the night! Let me tell you from experience—no one goes out on Thanksgiving night. We were the only people in the bar and I have no idea why we thought this would be a good idea. At least we had the place to ourselves…
This year we are having Thanksgiving dinner at home. We’ve done this before and while it’s not all that exciting, it’s nice and relaxing. We don’t have to dress up to impress anyone—even though my sisters and I take this opportunity to show off our new winter boots and sweaters. But makeup, we don’t need makeup—that’s a lie we usually wear makeup in case of a photo opportunity. Regardless, it is a stress free day—except for my mom going crazy about the turkey and how it’s never fully cooked. Okay so maybe it’s not all that relaxing but I’m a sucker for holidays and any kind of excitement. Thanksgiving also means that Christmas is next—my favorite holiday of all!
As soon as the day is through, it’s time for Christmas decorations. I say this—but it usually takes me a week or two to actually start putting them up. I turn into a Christmas elf and go a little crazy, but why not? This is my favorite time of the year (the most won-der-ful time of the year)! Whatever your tradition, remember to have fun and enjoy your time off! Happy Holidays!
